by Annabeth Leong
Thanks so much for hosting me today!
Many years ago, I saw a comedian on TV talking about how sexy people think it is to do something for the first time. She talked about her lover whispering in her ear, “Have you ever done this before?” Then she went on to the awkwardness of trying to figure out how to respond to that. “Well,” she said, “not on the hood of this car.” (I wish I could remember which comedian this was—I think it was Margaret Cho, but my Internet searches have failed to confirm that).
Whoever made the joke, it’s made an enormous impression on me over the years. I’ve been amazed at how true it is, but I’ve also found some hope in the punch line. Allow me to explain.
The joke is true because at this point, I’m far from innocent. I’ve done a lot of things with a lot of people, and it’s pretty unlikely that any lover is going to be able to introduce me to any significant mystery of sex. I’m all for roleplaying, but short of that, the ship has sailed on most of the popular milestones.
On the other hand, “not on the hood of this car” offers a lot of interesting possibilities. There are plenty of things that I can do differently or in different ways, and there are plenty of things that feel very different depending on who I’m with. At a point in my life when I might expect myself to feel jaded, I’m often amazed by how fresh it can be to make love, and how many things feel new and revelatory.
In my recent release, One Flesh, I got into this because first times became an issue between the two main characters. Leticia and Rosalie are getting married. Leticia is Rosalie’s first female lover, which means that many of the things they’ve done together were firsts for Rosalie. Not so for Leticia. When the wedding night comes up, Rosalie wants to find something that will be a first for Leticia as well.
Ultimately, it takes bravery and good communication to come up with a suitable first—and I think what Leticia and Rosalie do goes far beyond being on the hood of a different car. I think the main point, for me, is that there is a vast sexual territory to explore, and the traditional checklist of firsts doesn’t even begin to cover it. There’s still plenty to discover.
Title: One Flesh by Annabeth Leong
Publisher: Storm Moon Press
Genre: Contemporary, Erotic, Romance, F/F
Word Count: 10,600
Leticia and Rosalie are planning their wedding, wanting very much to make their special day one to remember, but Rosalie has something else weighing on her mind, one more thing she wants to make as special and as memorable as the ceremony itself—their wedding night. Rosalie wants to be with Leticia in a way that neither of them had ever been with anyone else. But finding something that would be a first time for both of them turns out to be harder than expected.
As it turns out, there is one thing Leticia has wanted to do but has never trusted anyone enough to allow herself to overcome the fear of it. And it’s something that Rosalie has never done either.
The women discuss the idea of fisting as a means of connecting and forming an intimate bond with each other, one that they’ve never formed with anyone else. They’ve never loved or trusted anyone else they way the love and trust each other, and they are determined to find a way to make it work.
“I’ll call tomorrow to tell the church how many flowers we want to order,” Leticia said, sighing and folding her notebook closed. No matter how many neat lists she made with her favorite purple pen, the sheer quantity of wedding-related details was overwhelming. “Can you call the caterer back, Rosalie? I still feel like they sneaked a charge in somewhere, but I can’t get a straight answer out of them about it.”
Her fiancée smiled indulgently. “Better yet. I’ll go in person on my lunch break, and they won’t know what hit them.”
“Great.” Leticia rubbed her temples and closed her eyes. She’d wanted to go to bed early, but another evening of wedding planning had made that completely impossible. She was excited to be marrying her one true love and all, but it was easy to lose track of that when she had fourteen phone calls to make and her mother demanded an e-mailed progress report every single night. “That’s got to be enough for now.”
Leticia stole a quick glance at Rosalie. She’d changed into a cute pair of pajamas when she got home from work, the childish pattern an odd contrast with her sophisticated coppery makeup. Leticia briefly fantasized about peeling the clothing away, revealing her lover’s curves and smooth brown skin. Unfortunately, at that very same moment, she had to stifle a yawn. She was so damn sleepy. They would need to get to bed immediately if she was going to give Rosalie proper attention.
“We can’t quit planning yet,” Rosalie said. “We haven’t discussed the most important thing, and it’s coming up soon.”
Leticia groaned. She flipped her notebook open again and paged through her color-coded, highlighted lists. “We’ve talked about everything I had listed for the day, and we even went over things that have deadlines coming up in the next few days. I don’t see what we’re—”
“The wedding night,” Rosalie purred. “We haven’t discussed that at all.”
There was no mistaking the sparkle in her eyes. Leticia actually blushed, the way she had at Rosalie’s makeup counter the first time they met, when the other woman’s soft words of praise, roughened by the obvious desire in her voice, had gotten Leticia so hot and flushed it had been impossible to identify the correct shade of foundation for her skin tone. She’d been forced to come back later, not that she’d minded.
Now that she’d figured out what Rosalie was hinting at, Leticia played innocent. For all her lover’s passion, her Catholic upbringing had left her with an adorable aversion to using direct language. Leticia loved to watch Rosalie get flustered while trying to explain her naughty desires. She batted her eyelashes and focused on her notes again. “We’ve reserved our hotel room the night of. We’ve got our plane tickets to Puerto Rico for the honeymoon a couple days after that. Everything appears to be in order.”
“The wedding night,” Rosalie said, apparently oblivious to Leticia’s teasing. She rolled her hands through the air, one over the other, the gesture an invitation to take the word “night” and run with it. “The whole reason I wanted an afternoon wedding was so we could have plenty of time together. Afterward. In the hotel.”
“You mean to take a good, long nap? I’m sure we’ll be tired after dealing with all the guests, and coming down from pre-wedding nerves, too.” Leticia couldn’t resist continuing the act.
“Not a nap. But I am talking about what we might do in bed.”
Annabeth Leong has written erotica of many flavors—dark, romantic, kinky, vanilla, straight, lesbian, bi, and menage. Her lesbian stories have appeared in the Lambda Literary Award-nominated Lesbian Cops, Circlet Press’s love-spell anthology Like Hearts Enchanted, Lovecraftian erotica book Whispers In Darkness, and others. When not writing erotica, she is frequently reading it. She has lived in six states in various parts of the United States, and traveled to most of the others. Annabeth believes passionately in freedom of speech, rights for people of all sexual orientations, and the need for compassionate religion. She loves shoes, stockings, cooking, and excellent bass lines.
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